Dentist

So, I had a very productive morning today at the dentist. In a span of 30 minutes, I learned how to:

• properly cut an onion
• properly clean a head of lettuce
• properly make a dry martini

All thanks to Martha Stewart being on Good Morning America.

I also had a revelation in the dentist chair...dental hygienists should also be able to wax eyebrows. I mean why not? You are already laying down and they have those bright lights just like my wax lady. This is a really good idea, almost as good as Kramer's idea of a make-your-own-pizza pizza restaurant.

Upon departing the dentist, I promptly drove to Starbucks to de-whiten my teeth. Actually, I just wanted some coffee but I'm sure it slightly counter-acted the work they did.