Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Day 7 of Sleep Deprivation

When is Breaking Dawn going to get here?


I don't know how I survived last night.

Oh wait, I stayed up too late catching up on Gossip Girl.

Good idea.


According to Amazon it won't be here until Monday but it is in Memphis right better be here by Thursday, I have to finish it before Baby Fish Mouth's events or I am going to be "using the restroom" for extended periods of time.

PS - Stephenie, if you are reading this, please, PLEASE, still write Midnight Sun. With a cherry on top.

PSS - Um, I should be playing Bella in the movies. I even have the vampire teeth, au natural. Pale skin is my thing! And I talk in my sleep and grind my teeth. I'm just missing the brown eyes but maybe when she transforms she can have green eyes instead! Or, I could just wear colored contacts. Can I at least be an extra?

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Stephenie Meyer/Twilight/Need to Sleep...

Ugh, I am O-B-S-E-S-S-E-D. The Twilight series is AWESOME.





I wonder if my boss would let me take a leave of absence so I can finish reading these books 24/7...

I ordered Breaking Dawn on amazon yesterday and it better get here FAST.

And for all you weirdos that think mystical stuff is un-Christian, please, GO AWAY. It is called FICTION for a reason. Or is it fiction??? HHHMMM?????

I would probably feel better if Vampires were actually the cause for many murders than by people that are just incredibly HORRIBLE.

Go to and buy the books.

Stephenie, if you're reading this, I heart you, let's get coffee some time and talk about your books. I'll even babysit your kids. Bye.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

What They Should Be Doing

Now this, THIS makes sense.

The Dog Park Is No Longer My Happy Place

As most of you know, I like to frequent the dog park. Despite a post in which I described an unfortunate instance of a dog humping train, I still take Zoe about once a week. She gets to play, I get to unwind. It's a win win situation.

Until this past Saturday.

Something horrible happened.

And it didn't involve the dogs.

A certain individual who shall remain nameless because I don't know his name, was wearing jeans that were a wee bit too short.

That wasn't the worst part, shocking, I know.

This young man, let's call him "Joe the Plumber", sat down on a bench to chat to his lady friend. Except when he sat down, his pants dropped about 10 inches give or take a couple judging by the amount of ASS CRACK THAT WAS ON FULL DISPLAY.

I have never seen such horrible plumbers crack before! Not even when, on a separate occassion, a girl's thong was hiked up to her ears while she was bending over to get her dog!

It was HORRIBLE. One bystander commented that it was worse than gay porn which is pretty bad if you aren't into that kind of thing.

The worst thing about it was that it was actually a pretty chilly day, so HOW COULD JOE NOT FEEL THE COOL BREEZE SHOOTING DOWN HIS CRACK???!!!

I have come to the conclusion that he knew what he was doing and that he was more concerned with how his jeans looked from the lady friend's view than from THE REST OF THE WORLD.


I'm still in recovery. The only thing that seems to be helping is my ass crack anon class.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Not Again.

Some of you may remember the "leggings" post. Well, my Mom and I were at the mall a couple of weeks ago and she tried on a pair of cowboy-ish boots. I made a passing comment that they would look cute with skinny jeans tucked inside of them. She said, "Oh, I can't wear skinny jeans with my hips!". She then said, "Maybe I could wear them with leggings".

Um, back up a minute. If you cannot wear skinny jeans, you most DEFINITELY CANNOT WEAR LEGGINGS.

NOT THE LEGGINGS TALK AGAIN! What is with my Mom and leggings? She is convinced that this is the trend she needs to latch onto yet doesn't think she should be wearing skinny jeans.

WHERE IS THE LOGIC? Spandex is way way less forgiving than denim. I am going to do everything within my power as a considerate and fashion conscious daughter to prevent the purchase of said leggings...for the second year in a row. This is practically a part time job people.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

It's Time for Some Campaignin'

I think I could watch this 20 more times and still be entertained...oh, and sorry about Arnold advertising at the end. haha.